Farewell
by shiningjess
Summary: Dedicated to Sarah, also my V-Day fic. Is it really that hard to say goodbye? Featuring Hitsugaya Toshirou & Kurosaki Karin.
1. Chapter 1

**Farewell. **

**A fic dedicated to my dearest cousin, Sarah. Love ya lots. **

**Also my V-Day special, staring, Hitsugaya Toshirou & Kurosaki Karin.**

--

_Is is really that hard to say goodbye?_

--

The Japanese styled wooden gate stood in the middle of the grass field. The light from the other side passed through the checked boxes to the green below. Hitsugaya Toshirou, the white haired, teal eyed, 10th division captain stood, back facing the door and eyes staring at the only person who came to send him off. Not that he had no friends, but because he only chose to inform only one person of his departure.

The short haired girl stared back at Toshirou. She was Kurosaki Karin, sister of the soul reaper subsitute.Her usual defiant eyes were gone, now replaced by a pair of teary eyes. Her ever sharp tongue was at a loss for words. What could she say? She wondered when Toshirou would be sent back to the real world for a mission again? One month? Two months? 1 year? Never? The thought of that caused her heart to sink. The thought of never seeing Toshirou again pierced her heart. She did not understand why the departure of someone would make her feel this way. Ichigo had his share of leaving the household without word, but she never felt such an intense jab in her heart before. Maybe, she did know why.

She was in love with him.

But what right did she have to fall in love with him? She was just a mere human who could see spirits while he was of the captain rank in Soul Society. He had power, strength, looks and everything in one, while she, didn't even have the looks to begin with. She wasn't as strong as he was either. Oh well,she assured herself, his departure would be good for her.

Karin felt her heart being sucked away by the light that came from the other side of the shutters. She couldn't breathe, she didn't dare to breathe. It was as though if she took a breath, tears was going to roll down her cheeks from her already watery eyes. But she won't. She would force herself not to, she didn't want him to see her cry.

--

The excitement and enthusaism from Hinamori Momo when she said she as going to leave for the Academy was still etched in Toshirou's heart. He still remembered the unspoken pain he felt within his heart whenever she came back and told him about all the Academy happenings. It was as though someone else had took away his Hinamori. somehow everyone else was more important than him in her life. And then Aizen came along and things took a fatal turn. That bastard, Hinamori not only looked up top him, she admired him, she was infactuated with him. And that was when he knew he lost her forever. She didn't say good bye this time, but her eyes said enough.

That was how Toshirou lost the first person who cared about him so much.

He didn't know how Karin became such an important person to him. But it didn't matter now. What mattered was that, he was going to lose someone close to him again. He wasn't sure that she was that important to him at first, but when the same pain that washed over him when Hinamori left him washed over him once again, he knew. He knew that a part of his heart belonged to her already.

He turned his head to look at the shutter that separated this world from the next. Suddenly this door meant more than that, This door became the door that would separate him from someone who had found the key to his heart. The moment he cross that door, he knew that his heart would be locked to the world again.

Is there no other way, he asked.

--

**This story should be about 3-4 chapters long and I will def complete it by Valentine's Day ) So yea xD Reviews? **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach **


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2. Wanted to post it yesterday but I was kinda busy. So well. Here goes. Chapter 2, a whole chapter of recollections between Toshirou and Karin. Hope you enjoyed it.**

**To Sarah: Smile! If all else fails I still love you ) **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach **

--

_"There you are again!"_

_7pm. Sunset. Toshirou sat at the railing of this deserted road uphill, hands by the railings with his green eyes fixated at the sunset._

_He remained silent to her call. So she ran all the way towards him and tugged at his arm. Toshirou tried to suppress a little smile as she did so. Karin was indeed different from other people. She may look like a child, but she wasn't as bratty as those others that he saw. But that didn't mean she was totally innocent to the whining that children usually do. There was no way he could stop her from achieving something that she wanted. On the other hand, she may be kind to people around her, but yet there was always a rebel streak in her. That streak had caused her to not play by other people's rules but her rules. She probably got that from her brother, Toshirou concluded._

_All in all, she was a mixture of a mature and immature and that intriuged Toshirou. Unlike people of Soul Society. Soul Society felt like a clone army sometimes where everyone sets their sights on training and fighting to get to a particular seat and after they achieve their first aim the cycle goes round again. The only interruptions to this montonous cycle only came when there was an invasion of sorts, which obviously, rarely happens. During those times, was when one would see the other side of everyone. So in all, there wasn't indivduality to talk about in Soul Society at all._

_Karin was the direct opposite. She was the embodiment of indivuality and character. And she took his breath away._

_There was one other thing he didn't want to admit. Though it was true that he did enjoy looking the susnet from this particular spot but there was another reason why he was always there. _

_He knew she would come._

_"Come on,. why are you always looking so gloomy!" Karin said, grabbing his arm and interrupting his train of thoughts, "Let me show you fun places,"_

_And Toshirou let Karin drag him._

_--_

_That was the first and the only time Toshirou went to an amusement park in the real world. He didn't like the bright lights that shone around the place and he knew Karin knew it as she made several comments about him being too grumpy for a fun place. He remembered the pirate ship, the roller coaster and other weird rides that Karin dragged him along to. Well, he couldn't understand why humans enjoyed these "thrill rides" but he did enjoy staring at Karin's expression when she screamed her head off at one of these weird rides._

_Karin also excitedly dragged him to those little shops that were inside or lined the perimeter of the amusement park. Some sold food, some sold drinks, some were games. Karin dragged Toshirou to these litte stalls and she particularly enjoyed the games. She was literally winning the soccer one to the disappointment of the stall holder. The price for her victory was a huge teddy bear which she tried to give it to Toshirou who tried to give it back to Karin saying that he had no use for it. So began a series of "pushing-the-bear-to-each-other". The final outcome of this little match was that they decided to give the bear to Yuzu, Karin's twin sister._

_--_

_"Where are we again?" He asked._

_"A circus,where people perform stunts!" Karin excitedly told him._

_"Why do I have this feeling that it's not going to be exciting," Toshirou muttered under his breath._

_"Ahem, I heard that," Karin narrowed her eyes at Toshirou, "I don't care whether is it fun to you or not, it's fun to me for one, for two, you have never been to a circus before, so take this as an experience,"_

_Right. Toshirou thought to himself as the performance went on. He felt that the ringmaster was too much of an actor and the stunts didn't impress him either. But everytime he turned, he would see Karin's awestruck face. She looked so captivated in the show that she didn't even realize that Toshirou was staring at her. He examined her features, her short hair, her eyes, her face. He never realized someone could be this innoccent and this pretty before._

_He wanted to kiss her._

_Thank goodness the applause and cat calls from the audience snapped him back to reality._

_--_

_"Why are these animals trapped in cages," Toshirou asked Karin, "Aren't they supposed to be out in the wild?"_

_"Ah, this is a zoo, Toshirou, these animals are here for display,"_

_"Display?" He replied, not really understanding the concept of it. The only conclusion he could come up with was that humans were plain queer. _

_Karin dragged Toshirou through the sunday crowd (which he hated) to the other side of the zoo, where the sea animals resided in various tanks. Curious visitors were seen putting theirs hands onto the tank surface as though trying to feel the creatures that lived in it. Toshirou didn't really understand the rationale for that, but he decided to not probe further. His stay in the real world had taught him that humans are just bizzare. It was then a dolphin leaped above the water in a nice curve before dipping into the water once again with a splash. As the audience clapped for the dolphins, Karin bent over and whispered into Toshirou's ears, " They are my favourite animals,"_

_Toshirou looked at Karin. Ah, indeed, she was like a dolphin, carefree and beautiful, living and enjoying life in her own rhythmn and yet awe the people who looked at her._

_--_

_Karin couldn't help but laughed when she saw Toshirou's back straighten up and eyes sprang wide open as the lights in the theatre dimed._

_"Relax," She said in between her laughter._

_Toshirou heaved a sigh of relief. For a moment he thought that something bad was going to happen._

_"Just sit back and watch the show okay? I promise you it's a good movie,"_

_Karin noticed that Toshirou was still pretty tensed up so she took the effort to put her hands on his shoulder and pushed it back gently to the cushions of the seat, _

_"Relax," She repeated._

_Toshirou found himself looking into Karin's eyes and for that moment Toshirou thought he stopped breathing in beauty of her eyes. He thought he felt his heart stop, he thought he saw heaven in her eyes, a sensation that he could not put a name to just washed across him. Did they pause in that postiion long? Was is awkward to the people around them? He did not know. The only thing he knew was that Karin was looking straight into eyes too. But after what felt like a long while, Karin just blinked and moved back to her seat as though nothing happened. Wait, did he see her blush?_

_It was then a bang was heard from the speakers. Karin saw Toshirou bolted up from the comfort of his seat and looked around and laughed once more, "It's just a sound effect,"_

--

**That's all for Chapter 2. I hope you all liked the recollections. This mini story is ending in the next chapter ) And tomorrow's is V-Day (For me, that is, because I stay in Singapore) In any case, reviews? **

**Till then, **

**See ya ) **


	3. Chapter 3

I was curious why this chapter wasn't posted and that the story's already long completed -- Anyhows. Here goes.

--

"Since you like heights, I have decided to bring you here,"

As Toshirou stepped on the rooftop,a vast empty spread of concrete, a cool breeze blew at his face. He knew he liked the place instantly as he walked towards the edge of the buliding and looked out. The whole of Kakakura Town was visible from his position. He couldn't help but notice the contours of the city, it was so different from Soul Society. Soul Society was clean, the lines were stright, all the houses were of the same length, but over here, yes, there was some form of organization,but the buildiings are off different heights for one. For two, the design of the houses varied from one to another, the variety was absolutely stunning to Toshirou.

"Like it? This is the highest spot in our town," Karin said from the back, hadns behind her back and her head popping from above his shoulders.

So close, Toshirou thought. I could feel her breathing.

And their eyes met again.

-  
"Toshirou," her voice, now in a whisper.

"Karin,"

She was the one that was silent this time.

"Karin,"

When would be the next time he would be able to say this name?

"Toshirou," She said his name again, this time her voice in a tremble, "Let me look into your eyes again,"

He let his teal eyes interlock with her brown eyes one last time and let himself drown in it. People once said that the eyes are windows to one's soul, within Karin's eyes, Toshirou found something that would make his heart skip a beat, He couldn't exactly lay a finger on what was it, but it was just her, only she had the magic to do so. Toshirou wished that he could stare at her eyes forever. He then spotted tears welling up in her eyes. No, please don't cry. He thought he felt his heart shatter at the hint of tears in her eyes. But yet he realized he was the source of the tears. He thought he felt the burden of the world on his shoulders. He began wondering, would it be better if he wasn't a soul reaper? Would it better if he wasn't Captain? Would it better if he did not have so much responsiblities? The responsiblites that rob him of someone so dear to him?

But he knew, he knew his ponderings would end up nowhere. He was a soul reaper. He was a captain. And he couldn't change any of that even if he wanted to. And since he couldn't let those go, he would have to let her go. Although, he really did not want to.

Underneath his green eyes, Karin also saw that it was troubled. Karin thought she saw the whole time she spent with him under his eyes. The way he picked up her soccer ball the first time they met, then the subsquent meetings on that particular railing, how his green eyes told more than he wished to say. She never probed about whatever that had happened to him, she knew he was uncomfortable with them. But there were some things that never escaped her eyes. The loneilness, the sadness, something that called out to her innermost being. That was same reason why she reached out to him, asked him out to the different places and tried to make him smile.

His eyes was always so captivating.

They broke away slowly.

Toshirou turned around silently. The words good bye somehow could not exit his lips at all. Even walking as suddenly so hard. But he knew he had to go. He was obliged to go. So he proceeded.

"Toshirou," She called his name again and her voice halted his footsteps. She knew she had to say it and so she did,

"I love you,"

"I love you too,"

To hear him say that, was enough for Karin. More than enough.

--

It was 7pm again.

The sun was setting once again.

Karin stood at the railings once again, watching as the sky grow from blue to orange to black.

_Toshirou, are you staring at the same sunset as me?_


End file.
